Self Acceptance

After over two years of being 'Frank', I can finally, whole-heartedly say that I accept myself.

For a very long time, I felt a lot of anger and frustration that I wasn't 'normal' and that my life had to be so much harder simply because I was transgender.

I felt useless, helpless and incredibly unattractive.

I still feel this way the large majority of the time, but if I have learned anything from the LGBTQ community, it's to own who you are.

For example, the word queer used to be a derogatory term for anybody under the LGBTQ umbrella, until the community took the word and said 'Yes, I am queer, and there's nothing wrong with that!'

Once you embrace who you are, you can start to build a happy life with healthy relationships.

I am transsexual and I am going to own it.

I'm the person people come to when they have loved ones who are struggling with their gender identity.

I'm the person people come to when they have questions.

I'm the person that can potentially help a trans brother or sister get through the difficult stages I've already been through.

And there's nothing wrong with that.

Same goes for any other transman or transwoman.

You may be in an unusual situation or been through a difficult event yourself. Pick yourself up, do what you have to do to be happy, learn from that experience and encourage others who have been through the same, and perhaps feel very alone, to keep going and live a fulfilled life.

Inspire happiness.

This doesn't mean that I'm in any way comfortable with my body, I still have a very long way to go before I will feel that way, but that won't stop me from being who I am now.

This also doesn't mean that I want everybody to know that I'm trans. More than anything I want to be viewed as a biological guy and I'm fortunate enough to have reached a stage where strangers don't even question my gender anymore. Being trans isn't even a particularly large part of my life anymore, because I'm surrounded by people who don't treat me differently. However, in my community, I will reveal absolutely everything and anything to help a brother/sister and, likewise, I know they've got my back.

A community always comes down to the individuals. If we learn to own ourselves, we will individually become much happier. This would result in a much happier society. The difficulty arises when we must realise that it is okay to be ourselves but it is also okay for our neighbour to be very different. My stance on this matter has always been 'if they're not hurting anybody, then I have no problem with them'.

Perhaps if more people thought the same way, there would be more love in the world.

fab